Some of you may be disappointed upon reading my blog title, but yes, it’s true. I am selling the RV and moving into a studio. I feel in my heart it’s the right thing to do. It’s one less stress on my mind at a time when I’ve felt a whole lot of stress and overwhelmed-ness. I move in on April 1st, and will have the assistance of a friend to move my large cat tree and a recliner chair, plus the table and chairs he has offered to give me for free.
The studio is furnished and comes with basic cable and internet. I’m responsible for the electric, but the place is only 499 sq feet so I don’t think it will cost too, too much, to heat or cool. At least it will be better insulated than my RV was this past summer and winter. That should help. All the appliances in the building are electric – I’m finding that to be the case a lot in the southwest, or the heat is by propane in some places. (It’s a weirdness to get used to after having been in the northeast where houses or buildings were sometimes heated by oil or natural gas. Rarely did I hear about a house being heated by propane.) I am going to like being surrounded again by four walls of a permanent nature, rather than living in a structure that was only built to be lived in for three seasons of the year. And also, it comes with a washer and dyer and a NORMAL shower. Or, should I say, a NORMAL-SIZED shower?
So. Now, I get to sell the RV. A few people have asked about it in the employee housing area where I am, and have offered to make some payments on it. I am very leery of doing something like that as it makes me a defacto landlord, and that’s just another stress I don’t want on my head. Plus, I have a loan on the RV and because of that, I carry more insurance on it. I don’t want to be liable for anything that happens with it. My other option is do it as a consignment sale with the dealer from whom I originally bought it. I am a bit worried about not being able to sell it for what I still owe on the loan, but I have resigned myself to possibly losing money on it and just doing the best I can to minimize the chance of that happening.
I have made it through the first few days without the girl who had been training me, on site. There were only two of us all day on Monday, and we were hopping, especially in the afternoon at rush time. We had problems getting the door closed and were there past closing by about a half hour. But we did the best we could. I guess that’s all we can ask.
I’ve been having issues controlling my anxiety lately, and it is quite possible it’s all situational. But I decided to take Prozac again, just the very smallest dosage of 20 mg. I started a few days ago and it does seem to be helping me to focus. I need to find a local doctor to discuss it with, and it’s my plan to find one as soon as I have medical insurance again, sometime in April. I found myself feeling many moments of panic over the past few weeks, much more than I ever remember experiencing in the past several years. I also had crying jags that have made me very uncomfortable. (Not sure if “jags” is a real word, but hey, it is now.) And just all around feeling like shit about myself, indulging in negative self-talk. I started to let it get out of control, which was really bad.
I know that it sounds like I have been see sawing back and forth on the decision whether to take Prozac or not, and I admit, I have. Part of me has wanted to just be free of all medicine for two reasons. I’ve wanted to see what I am like when not taking medication for anything. And a small part has not wanted to have to deal with doctors or paying for the medicines on a long term basis. I now understand those commercials that show people choosing to either pay for their medicines or put food on the table. (It’s not that dire, but when you were living as close to the line as I was when in Utah, it totally hits home.) But as a very wise friend or two, or three (ok, many) have told me, it’s important to gauge what and how I am feeling, and to listen to my body and what it is telling me.
While my financial situation has improved, having the studio is not cheap in an area known for having lots and lots of tourists. I will still have to mind my income and not be spending all crazy in one direction or another. I still have items I need to save for, and the RV will need to be paid off entirely. I want to pay off my car this year if at all possible. It would be awesome to no longer have a car payment. But I’m getting ahead of myself and that is a blog post for another day.
Thank you, as always for reading, and for be patient with long stretches in between blog posts. It’s just been a lot to take in these past few weeks and sometimes, I just want to sit and relax either on my couch or with Baby O on my lap at the beach. I believe this last bit is what they call self-care. It’s something none of us should ever neglect. It might not be the same as a physical activity like running, but it’s a way to relax. I’ll still run whenever I can, but working 10-11 hour days will also take a lot out of me too, and I need to remember that too.
If you have any words of wisdom or thoughts on all this craziness that is my life, please feel free to share. Just be nice, and try to not be too disappointed in that I am giving up the RV life. This is just the right thing for me to do. I need to have four permanent walls around me again, to be happy. And yes, it means I am setting up roots in the Lake Powell area for at least a year.
Chasing Simple Dreams 
Living in an RV is not for everyone. There are advantages and downsides to both ways of living, but it really is infinitely easier to relax in a unit that is well insulated and doesn’t rock back and forth in the wind. It’s just hard to relocate it! ;->
Virtual hugs,
Judie
Exactly!! WE had 50 mph wind gusts, I think, last week, and I was so grateful my friend Bill helped me solidify this thing! I’m just looking forward to not being responsible for the repairs.
To thine own self, be true!!
I’m glad you think it’s a good decision for me. I know it’s different than what you and Mike have done and have found works for you.
That’s what I am trying to do, for sure… just taking me a long time to figure out what that is….
Look on the bright side, at least its not a home mortgage you’re trying to get out of =)
Yep, that is a definite benefit.
You need to do what is right for you and not worry about what anyone else thinks. That’s part of taking care of you. I hope the job gets easier and that you feel settled soon!
Me too, Dawn. Me too. This week was incredibly busy with it being spring break combined with Easter, so it was trial by fire! We did ok, but god, were we pooped at the end of our week!
I recently sold my motorhome and moved to Texas to be closer to family.I know what you mean about having a normal-sized shower and W/D.There are pros and cons to everything in life,and don’t be concerned what anyone else thinks.It is your life! You need to find what makes you happy.
I am realizing that more and more. When I was trying to decide on what RV to get, it was all about the pros and cons with that – the lightness that came with a smaller trailer, but what you would give up on in terms of amenities and space. I did my last loads of laundry today at the laundromat, and I can’t wait to do laundry next weekend where I can just put it in and get other stuff done!
Sounds wonderful. Bet you and the furkids will love some cozy simplicity!
We most definitely will! And I admit, I think they need more space than the RV affords them, especially my CAllie who hides out in her perch in the closet all day long.
Stability is important when you need it, and the RV life is anything but stable by definition. I also vacillate between RVing and wanting a house. Lately, the house is winning out more and more, especially after our fierce El Nino winter. Take care of yourself and do exactly what YOU need to do. It seems that lots of folks go back and forth from RVing to sticks and bricks, depending on what’s going on in their lives. Hugs.
Yes, I don’t want to be so cold again this winter – I now know why my mom was so freaked out and worried about me being cold in the RV. They just really are not made for year round living and with me not being handy, it just scares me to think of everything that can go wrong in it. I’d rather have someone fix the things I use when they break. Hugs back to you too!
I know how you feel about wanting to see what you are like off of all medication, but also sort of needing it to function at least somewhat “normally”. I’ve been on something (various doses) for so long now! I don’t know about you, but for me changes are the hardest, so it totally makes sense to go back on the Prozac while you are adjusting to a new job and home and longer too if that makes you feel best!
Love hearing about your travels and you are certainly not the only one “taking a while” to figure out what’s right for you.
Carolyn, thank you – it feels really good to read this from you. I also hear from others how they need to be on medications off and on too. It’s good to hear I am not the only one taking a long time to figure out my life too. I wonder, do we ever actually figure it out? 🙂
Good day, lady. We are now on the road and debt free. We just got our internet yesterday, and now I am playing catch up 🙂 I pray you can sell the rv without problem, and can sell it without having to take a loss. Hang in there on the medicine. I am again whittling down my citralopram dosage, and hope to be off of it entirely by the end of June. It is not easy when you have taken it for a long term. Hugs and prayers for you.
So sorry for the delay in my writing back to you! I sold the RV last week – I still have to do a blog post about it! Because of the way the internet works around here, I have not been on as much either (using data on my cell phone right now), but I am so glad for you!! I wish you lots of luck in whittling down that med – I ‘ve not had experience with it, but agree, yes, when you’ve been on something for so long, your body really does adjust to it, for sure.
Congrats on being DEBT FREE!!!!
Hi Terri:
I’m praying you can sell the RV real fast and get rid of the stress all together. You’ve tried the RV and it’s not working for you, so now move on. I wish we all had the courage like you to recognize when it’s time to move on about something. Talk about you inspiring the rest of us… Do what’s right for you girl.
Sending loves of love from the Belfon Barn.
I sold it!! I need to write up a blog post about it – just been an insane last few weeks with the move, and a lot of drama to deal with around the move (I will write you privately.)
I am very glad to be out of the RV – every morning when I take a shower and have room to stretch out and lots of hot water and pressure, well, it’s like I have died and gone to heaven. You guys have inspired me too – knowing that you don’t need a huge house to take care of your family. And the way you guys all love each other so much, it’s pretty inspiring to see. Hugs back to you guys.
Congratulations on selling your RV, some people have a lot of difficulty doing that or wait until the thing is completely trashed / worth nothing. I haven’t followed everything very closely, but looking at the most recent post… RVs aren’t meant for everyone and I can’t imagine living in one long-term. I live in a moderately sized 700sq ft / $800/mo apartment in North Dallas. Managing stress is a big part of life and knowing what your triggers are help a lot with coping. Sometimes priorities change and it’s part of being human I think.
For me, focusing on nothing but paying off debt each and every week made me stressed out. I spent 4 years obsessing about it and last 16 just thinking about the burden of my student loans in general. I’ve made a lot of progress on those and have taken on more debt. The big deal for me however is I took myself out of the process. Everything is automated or requires every little action from me. I periodically check and make changes as needed. None of this of course would be possible without steady income Just remember to breathe and talk to people when you feel stressed. You rock! 🙂
Thank you so much! By the way, I did see your shout out to me, and thank you so much for that. I’ve been reading all your posts and will get back to commenting, now that I have figured out a way to get online again with my computer in the new apartment. (Not as easy as it sounds, trust me.) And yes, selling the RV was like getting rid of a huge albatross.
i know what you mean to obsess about debt. At times I have gone through spurts where it is all I focus on, and then I loosen the reigns, and then the debt builds up again (much as it did with this most recent move of mine.) I have found that being in the apartmennt is much less stressful for me, living situation wise. I am able to take a normal length shower and I can actually turn around! (The shower in my RV was the size of a very small phone booth.) And I know that the building was built to last – when the winds hit 40-50 mph here as they usually do, I feel a lot safer and more protected.
Thank you again for the shout out, that was so kind!!
Enjoy your blog and insight. Have you tried Medical Marijuana? There are strains that don’t make you high, but deal with depression, anxiety etc… As a Veteran, I can tell you, it works much better and faster than pills. I never thought this would work for me, but I’m surprised at the results.
Good luck on your transition!
Thank you very much for your comment! I have not tried medical marijuana, and am trying to rid my body of stuff like medicines, as best as I can. Still trying to figure out how to do that for allergies, I admit, and am having problems finding something that works. (I am allergic to a lot – animal dander, pollens, dust, etc., all things that are pretty much around me all the time, lol.)
I’m glad to hear you have found something that works for you though!
The only thing that works for me and allergies is AC and air filters, stuck in a room. Sorry you suffer!
Yes, I have AC in the studio and I checked the air filter the other day and it looked good. Someone mentioned to me that they feel like their allergies kick in here in the desert, more so when the wind is blowing (and in this area, it can REALLY blow.) But part of the reason I moved here is to be outside, so I am powering through it. I’m also using the neti pot and i find that helps too. Keeps the sinuses clear.
Thx 4 sharing. Loved it.
Thanks, I’m glad you liked it!!!